It is obvious that cheating can be extreme harm to a healthier and happy relationship, as it can break down and damage the trust, honesty, respect and love that are at the core of any successful and long-term relationship. Research has shown that in any relationship, there’s up to a one in four chance that cheating may occur.
For most men, no single factor drives the decision to cheat. And sometimes a man’s reasons for infidelity evolve as his life circumstances change. Regardless of his true reasons for cheating, he didn’t have to do it. There are always other options – couple’s therapy, being open and honest with a mate and working to improve the relationship, or separation or divorce. A man always has choices that don’t involve degrading and potentially ruining his integrity and the life he and his significant other have created. And in this unsettling and unfortunate static, knowing why he cheated can be helpful in terms of not repeating the behavior in the future.
The reasons why men cheat
This is one of the main reasons why men cheat, simply by lacking maturity. Being immature in relationship has a lot of impact to a healthier and long lasting relationship. Maturity in love relationship is everything! First it is the ability to base a decision about a love relationship on a big picture – the long haul. In general, it means being able to pass up the fun for the moment and select the course of action which will pay off later. An immature person often put themselves first in most situations, without considering their partner’s feeling, thinking of being right even though they’re wrong and they are usually dishonest, unreliable and irresponsible.
Immature men usually cheats because he doesn’t know how a relationship works, he doesn’t fully understand that his action will have a negative side like hurting his partner, he may think it is okay to have fun and adventure with other girls.
The other reason why men cheat is focused around a man’s personal insecurity. When a man is insecure, he may feel as he is too old (or too young), not handsome enough, not rich enough, not smart enough. So to overcome this insecurity he needs a conformation or validation from a woman other than his partner.
Because of a man’s insecurities, lack of confidence, and underlying fears that he’s not good enough, he ends up looking for reassurance and affirmations of self-worth from others, both in and out of his relationship. In fact, an insecure man may be so worried about the state of his relationship that his fear of losing his partner can actually induce him to cheat, which in essence becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy. In a word, his lack of confidence ends up destroying the very foundation of the relationship he’s worried about losing.
3. Child Abuse
Sometimes the signs of child abuse don’t manifest until adulthood as a result he may be responding to unresolved childhood trauma- neglect, emotional abuse, physical abuse, sexual abuse, etc. in such cases his childhood wound have created intimacy issues that leave him unable or unwilling to fully commit to one person.
“Having spent several earlier segments of his ABC interview baring his soul, Jesse James admitted on Tuesday’s Nightline that he was the victim of abuse as a child, and that the shame of it drove him to cheat on his wife Sandra Bullock and destroy his perfect marriage. “
4. Sexually not being satisfied
This type of cheating usually happens after being in a long-term relationship. He may feel that his partner should fulfill every sexual desire regardless of how his partner is feeling at a particular time. He fails to understand she have feelings and thought of hers and to meet his expectation he seeks external fulfillment. Instead of dealing with these issues inside of their relationship, they are tempted to go outside. Researchers find that partnerships characterized by dissatisfaction in the bedroom, unfulfilling sex, and high conflict are at a higher risk of infidelity.
5. Emotionally not being satisfied
Some studies suggest that almost 50 percent of who involves with cheating do so because they are emotionally unsatisfied, unfulfilled and unhappy in their relationship. Men cheat in order to feel valued and emotionally supported, both of which they may not sense they receive from their partner. And rather than finding ways to have their emotional needs met in their current relationship, such as by frequently communicating with their partner, openly discussing their feelings and concerns, as well as having realistic and sensible expectations of their significant other, these men often seek out another person (or people) who can provide them with the emotional satisfaction, support, and empathy that they believe they’re lacking.
6. Ending a relationship
If he is unhappy and wants to break things off, he might cheat and then divorce her after cheating on her.
The other possibility is he has another girlfriend so in order to pursue things with her he is trying to end his other relationship or he may want to end his current relationship, but not until he’s got another one lined up. So he sets the stage for his next relationship while still in the first one.
7. Peer pressure, alcohols and drugs
He may cheat because his friends are cheaters. Research shows that over 75 percent of men who cheat have a close friend who also cheated. This might be because his friends are putting influence to cheat on him and this later becomes one shared experience that they can bond over. Friends can heavily impact his decision to give in to temptation, as friends are more likely to brand together when they decide to act impulsively and irrationally.
Otherwise he may have an alcohol or drug problem which may affects his decision making that will result a regrettable sexual decision.
Sometime men tend to cheat on their partner just because they get the chance or opportunity to have sex with other girl and don’t want to waste this opportunity.
Another reason why men cheat is simply due to the fact that their partner is cheating on them. Under these circumstances many men try going outside of their relationship trying to avenge and get back at their mate.
Revenge, anger towards his mate can make him try to hurt her and he may think the best possible way to hurt her is to cheat on her. In such cases, the infidelity is meant to be seen and know. The man does not bother to lie or keep secrets about his cheating, because he wants his partner to know about it.